Puns!! I’ve got so many of those to go around, it would make Miss Bradshaw’s head explode.
Seriously now, let’s talk lemons.
As you know, I’m not big on my food being more chemical than food and so when I took a look at my bottle of lemon juice (fresh lemons are of the few things I don’t buy fresh for some odd reason), I noticed it had way more than just lemons. Seemed kind of silly considering ain’t nothing else in a lemon but lemon.
I went out and bought an ungodly amount of lemons from Costco figuring it would give me the best bang for my big ones (awwww yeah). The second time I did this, I went Native American on the lemons and used every part of it. I know what you’re thinking – Native Americans, sensitive topic and Ev, lemons have but one part – lemon. I have a lot of love and respect for Native Americans and what we’ve done to them is a complete travesty, but that’s for another post. Also, lemons have more than one part/use, ya negative Nelly – you just have to change the way you utilize the things in your life.
I can’t tell you how many recipes I’ve ignored or had to finagle because they asked for lemon or lime zest. It seemed like such a pain in the ass… Go out, buy a lemon, zest a teaspoon, end of lemon’s purpose. Not anymore!
I washed the lemons well (even though really, whatever’s been sprayed on there is in there. You’re not washing anything off but visible dirt. I just did it to feel cleaner.), dried them and proceeded to grate 5 pounds of lemons. Not an easy task but I was finally catching up on The Sopranos at the same time and so it wasn’t the worst thing in the world. Once they were all naked and hating me, I flash froze (laid the zest out on a pan in the freezer for about an hour so that it doesn’t all clump together if I’d just packaged and froze it instead) the zest and stored it in a mason jar. Into the freezer it went and now I’m zestful all the time!
Second step was to juice those suckers. That was my original point and plan after all. After squeezing 5 pounds of lemons and reconsidering what I do with my time and life, I put it all through a strainer and poured the juice into ice cube trays. Once those puppies were done, into a freezer bag they went and now I have fresh lemon juice at my beck and call.
The rinds had a bit of juice and zest still on them because I’m a human being, you slave driver! and so they went straight into a bucket to be filled and covered with vinegar. Two weeks later I strained the mixture, added water and now have a perfectly good, surprisingly strong all-purpose house cleaner. Remember – always test a small area before using any new product because I can’t vouch for everything around your house and I want for us to stay friends.
Once you’re done, and the sad naked, juiced, used up lemons have done all they can, into the compost bin they go where they get to help contribute to the healthy growing of more food. Don’t know how/too lazy to compost? Into the garbage disposal they go for a cheap and easy way to disinfect and deodorize your system.
Ugh. Lemons kick so much ass.